Love, Empathy, Friendship

With restrictions here in France reduced, I have been reflecting on what makes life worthwhile, how we can continue to move towards a normal life agin and how we can work together to support each other post Covid. The usual update on our life here but I hope you will indulge me this month as, in addition, I take a little time to reflect on the way forward for all of us.

 “Rules for happiness: something to do, someone to love, something to hope for.”― Immanuel Kant

Do

Well, of course the garden is our main to do focus at this time of year. In the potager the tomatoes seem to have dodged the blight, although were showing signs of distress with all the rain, and are producing their tasty offerings at last. My favourite summer treat , cucumber soup, has made an outing and we have started preserving and squirrelling away the results of our labours. Winter veg are in and protected from the cabbage whites eggs by Kevin's patented net cages. If only the sun would stay around a bit more all looking good.

We have also been busy with projects to upgrade the lily pond and swimming pool areas.

Love

I haven't seen my daughter since February 2020 but the last week in July she was able to come to see me. There were some controls to comply with but nothing was going to stop her this time and she had her vaccines, purchased all her Covid tests and filled in all the paperwork and we were able to spend a lovely week filled with love and laughter together. Kevin's son and daughter and one of his grandsons are booked to visit in October half term so we are keeping everything crossed for that as we haven't seen them since July 2019.

The internet helps us to keep in touch with the rest of our family and we are pleased to see them looking happy and healthy and out and about again seeing friends and going on holiday. We have missed them chez nous this year but we don't feel completely isolated from them and accept that for the moment we have to keep in touch virtually. One way to combat the effects of the pandemic is to get out into the countryside  My son and his family took to a long boat for a week and I think these photos show how the experience benefitted adults and children alike.

This house usually has several summer visitors bit none were expected this year until our Swiss friends visited us in their motor home bringing their energy and their music to entertain us. What a delightful couple of days we had.

We have been lucky that our circle of friends has been able to meet with fewer restrictions and we have enjoyed musical evenings at our local bar and night markets together. The weekly sewing group might be more chat than sew but it has been such a support in these unusual times and every day there is a message or two keeping in touch. All makes me feel very loved.

Hope

We will have our first trip away for almost two years to celebrate my birthday next month. We aren't going far but seeing some bits of France that have been on the to do list for a long time. A break from daily life will be a great morale lifter I'm sure. We are seeing a return to activities for all age groups and are hoping that September will bring in a period without restrictions. I can't wait until I feel ready to visit everyone in the UK again. We are all hoping that life is returning to normal slowly.

Liberté, Egalite, Fraternité

Covid has affected everybody across the generations in different ways. We know we are lucky. We live in a rural location, we aren't losing revenue, we are generally in good health and we have each other. Now we are vaccinated we feel safer but we are still cautious in larger groups, in public places and with our own mental and physical health care. 

It is not chance that has me using for my title this month three words with the same initial letters as the French national motto Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité. This stage of the pandemic seems to be proving as divisive as the beginning. Anti vaxxers claim those who are vaccinated aren't thinking for themselves. Those who are vaccinated claim those who are not aren't thinking of others. The need to be vaccinated in order to enter certain places is emotive and here in France with the Pass Sanitaire in place from August 9th, at the heart of the dissatisfaction with this decision the word freedom is often used.

Liberté 

So what do we mean by freedom?  Is anybody completely free to do as they will?  Does your right to freedom compromise mine or vice versa? 

President Macron has recently stated “Chacune et chacun est libre de s’exprimer dans le calme, dans le respect de l’autre”, a-t-il souligné. Mais “la liberté où je ne dois rien à personne n’existe pas'. This dilemma of protecting poeple's individual freedoms whilst protecting society as a whole isn't a new dilemma and certainly not in the case of illnesses and vaccinations. Here is a quote from the Lancet in 1823 from an article that I think is worth a read entitled 'How to Talk About Freedom During a Pandemic': 

 “We cannot see that there is any undue violation of personal liberty in the sanitary authority acting for the whole community, requiring to be informed of the existence of diseases dangerous to others. A man’s liberty is not to involve risk to others,” the author wrote. “A man with smallpox has the natural liberty to travel in a cab or an omnibus; but society has a right that overrides his natural liberty, and says he shall not.”

Egalité

So in the current debate those who aren't vaccinated claim they are not being treated equally. Are they right?  In both the UK and France the government's restrictions have been compared to the Nazis treatment of the Jews and other minority groups, a comparison I, personally, abhor. It is true that being vaccinated gains access to certain venues and activities but no -one is being forced to be vaccinated, although they may be obliged to show a recent Covid test. Those who aren't vaccinated still have the freedom to shop, exercise and meet with family and friends. The regulations are temporary and are not influenced by race, gender, age, religion or sexual orientation.

Fraternité

A latecomer to the party. ' The third term, fraternité, was the most problematic to insert in the triad, as it belonged to another sphere, that of moral obligations rather than rights, links rather than statutes, harmony rather than contract, and community rather than individuality.'

It is natural to look first to the safety of ourselves and our nearest and dearest but one of the joys of the Covid pandemic was seeing communities across the world working together to help each other. There are many groups that will need support as we emerge from the pandemic.  Whatever our differences surely working together for the common good will help everyone? 

So I wish you all the happiness of Kant- Something to do, someone to love and something to hope for.

A bientôt

P.S. After 18 months of missing teeth I finally came to the end of the dental work and got my smile back! 

Broad beans are sleeping in a blankety bed.

This months title is from one of my favourite school harvest songs. It's called Paintbox and it always brings back memories of my teaching days. All the colours of the potager are here. Have a listen I am sure it will make you smile.

Potager ponders

It's a bit of a misleading title though as I have already harvested our broad beans. I sow them in the autumn and they are the first crop of the year. They are now shelled and resting in a very cold bed in the freezer ready to be used in many delicious recipes.

The unpredictable weather has made the start of the vegetable year a bit of a hit and miss affair. Too wet,  too cold and too changeable. Young plants struggled to get a good hold and some gave up thghost despite my best efforts. Finally, the soil has warmed up and those plants that made it are now responding eagerly to the sun's rays. Potatoes, onions, tomatoes, sweet corn are all doing well. Courgettes and squash are making an effort and I will be starting to sow carrots, parsnips and fennel this week. Despite the ups and downs the potager is always my happy place and hopefully, the bad start will soon be a distant memory and I will be tussling with my giant tomato plants as usual.

I don't spend all my gardening time in the potager, we do have flowers too!

Coming out

We have been out out!! We had a fun day in May. One of our friends has qualified as a wedding celebrant and the lovely Manoir de Biraud Bas was the venue for a wedding photoshoot. What a beautiful place to get married or renew your vows! 

Aperos at our local bar in the sunshine and this week to the cinema whoop, whoop it felt so good. The vaccination programme is rolling out well in France and from June 9th restrictions will be eased even more. 

We have even dared book a trip away for my birthday in early September. I have wanted to visit Les Jardins Suspendus de Marqueyssac -just into the Dordogne so not far but it will feel so liberating to actually leave home for a few days.

P. S.

The world is still an angry divided place and I am saddened by much of it. Division and hatred being fanned by those who should be uniting us. This image sums up my feelings about accepting others. I wish you all love and friendship. 

A bientôt.

April, April laugh thy girlish laughter

Spring has sprung.

Seedlings fill the kitchen window sill, the cold frames and even the guest bedroom.  I spend most of my days in the potager, my happy place, preparing the beds and planting out the first vegetables of the year. I check on my baby plants in the cold frame and breathe a sigh of relief when they have survived another night safely. I have to move seedlings on from the house as they get bigger but it is always a hard decision to take them from their warm nursery and get them ready to face the outside world.

Frost is the gardener's enemy at this time of year. A surprise hard frost hit the vines and fruit trees of the region this year and it was devastating for the growers. The loss of my first tomato plants is minuscule by comparison and isn't my livelihood but I was devastated and imagined that feeling on a grand scale. Even here in the mild SW France, we aren't free of frost until mid-May. Many gardeners wait until after the Saintes Glaces before planting or sowing in open ground, keeping plants covered and protected until then. The three saints' days that make up the Ice Saints fall on the 11th 12th and 13th of May and it is wise to protect against frost they have passed.  Read more about the history of  the Saintes Glaces here .

The potager does have some hardy guests. Chard still going strong from last year. Garlic and broad beans sown in the autumn. Red and yellow onions and potatoes planted this month and a new experiment with strawberries in pots along the fence. The other plots are all prepared and ready for warmer days.

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A Farewell

The death of the Duke of Edinburgh if not unexpected was sad. Every death at any age is hard for a family and this mourning had to be done in the public eye and with the media obsessing about their internal strifes and relationships. No one was surprised that the Queen was stoical in public as she has had to suffer public scrutiny for most of her life. There must have been consolation that he died at home.  

As you know I am not an idoliser of the Royal family and I found some of the national response mawkish and the blanket TV coverage a bit more reminiscent of a dictatorship than a democracy. So many families have lost loved ones during the pandemic and not been able to be by their side or have a funeral service and my thoughts were with them too. I wondered if the Queen was secretly relieved that the limitations due to Covid meant that the family had a quieter ceremony without the need for her to acknowledge dignitaries from home and abroad. 

The family released a reading of The Patriarchs - an Elegy by Simon Armitage to mark the funeral. It is very loving and I am sure many other families who have lost loved ones can identify and share in the sentiment. Do listen to it. Whatever your views on the monarchy I am sure that you, like me, will be very moved. 

The Patriarchs

That taxing time of year

Yes time to declare your revenue for 2020. France now has a pay as you go system but any amendments will be made based on your annual return. I see social media awash with advice and information on which form to fill in. I pretty much have it off pat after so many years doing it but it's always wise to watch out for a sneaky change to the forms. In my department, we have until the end of June to declare online,  but it has always been a job for May for me. I have all my information ready and will wait for a rainy May day to send it in.

Preparing my figures and reading the questions about the process on the internet made me wonder if there are as many people taking time to be honest about their declarations as there are people taking time to dodge their obligations. I bet many low paid workers would be happy to be earning enough to pay tax. Just as the concept of debt has gained respectability by being called credit why not talk about how privileged you are to pay taxes rather than a burden to be avoided.

Getting back to normal

Before the end of April, we will both have had both out Pfizer injections. As the vaccine programme picks up speed and the end of lockdown and curfew approach we look forward to being able to go out after 7pm and eat at our favourite restaurants, outdoors of course. We have been able to meet up in the daytime with friends living within a 10k radius so we are not completely isolated but it will be good to see who we want when we want and where we want. Fingers crossed mid-May will see an easing of restrictions. 

Stay well and a bientôt.

April, April, 
Laugh thy girlish laughter; 
Then, the moment after, 
Weep thy girlish tears! 
April, that mine ears 
Like a lover greetest, 
If I tell thee, sweetest, 
All my hopes and fears, 
April, April, 
Laugh thy golden laughter, 
But, the moment after, 
Weep thy golden tears!

William Watson

Down in the dumps ...... and up again.

 

Down.......

At the beginning of 2019 my eldest granddaughter put in a bid for my Spring visit to coincide with her birthday so flights and presents were packed. Then Covid reared its head and flights were cancelled and the birthday celebrations went ahead without Granny after all. Today is her birthday again and I am not there for the second year running, which brought it home to me how long we have been apart from family.  Their hopeful e mails about summer visits made me sadder rather than happier as I just don't know if it will happen. Some heavy dental treatment and a silly paperwork error finished me off and I got a real dose of the blues and just kept bursting into tears. I know we are lucky to be living here and I did try to count my blessings. Then my inbred, northern, methodist guilt at being ungrateful kicked in and I shed even more tears.

Up........

A few Facetimes, an impromptu lunch with friends and some sunshine set me back on track. We are all pinning our hopes on the vaccines which are rolling out slowly here in France. Kevin has had his but I am still waiting and not sure how long for, fingers crossed it wont be too long. There is quite an anti vaccine feeling here in France so the powers that be are trying to manage that and to build confidence as well as supplies. I'll let you know when it's my turn.

Down.......

I am increasingly saddened by how quickly people are to condemn often based on very thin information. Where people get their knowledge from interests me. In the run up top Brexit I often entered into discussions with Brexit supporters asking them what evidence they had for many of their claims. They were in the main better at making claims than providing evidence of it. What had fuelled their wrath and their indignation? 

Then the latest shock news the Harry/Meghan interview. Let me be honest, I don't get overexcited about the Royal Family and I am not interested in the life of this young couple either. Should they have made the televised interview? Probably not but it is the anger it has enflamed and the personal venom aimed particularly at Meghan Markle is unbelievable. The original muck stirrer Nigel Farage states that he knew on the day of the wedding that Merkel was planning to damage the monarchy. Piers Morgan continues his obsessed verbal abuse. Everyone is certain they know exactly who said what and when and that Markle is just evil. Kate wears pink the day after the interview and the Telegraph tells us that she chose the colour because it is 'the hue is thought to be a symbol of sympathy, compassion and friendship'.  If Markle had worn pink who knows what it would have symbolised. Take a moment to look at this article. If you cant' read it all check out the juxtaposition of the Daily Mail's Kate v Meghan reporting and this is just an example about how information is being manipulated

https://www.thelondoneconomic.com/opinion/if-you-hate-meghan-markle-this-is-why-256808/

In similar fashion to the Brexit campaign the tabloids have carefully prepared the soil of division and sowed their seeds of doubtful fact daily. These facts are the regurgitated as absolute truth on social media and no one cares that they are totally unsupported by evidence. . The Daily Express can't let a day go by with tweeting that the EU is crumbling. A girl is murdered and even when a suspect is under arrest social media is full of claims that the culprit must be an immigrant who arrived in a dinghy. Volunteers helping with food parcels thoughtfully try to include a taste of home for families on their list that are asylum seekers and the response is horrific. 

Meanwhile the prime minister is legally found to have been lying, Matt Hancock's mates seem to be first in line for huge contracts and no one queries how the areas to receive the Town funds announced in the budget were chosen. The virus roll out is successfully rolled out by the NHS while nurses are not to receive their planned pay rise. The trade secretary rolls over existing deals that in no way make up for those that are lost and voted most successful member of the cabinet. We are appalled to see the images of the vigil on Clapham common but don't seem to notice that the home secretary announces a new bill that will limit right to protest. She gives herself the power to fundamentally change the meaning of the law at any time without any real parliamentary scrutiny. See how this is reported differently here:

https://www.politics.co.uk/comment/2021/03/11/silencing-black-lives-matter-priti-patels-anti-protest-law/

and by the Daily mail

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9340333/Justice-Priti-Patel-handed-powers-crack-activists-wreaking-havoc.html

People wonder why those that chose to benefit from free movement and move to a different country should be interested in or even have the right to comment on the UK.  I remain a British national and a british tax payer and I will always care passionately about my birth country.  I want to be able to feel proud to be British but at the moment I feel sad and worried.

https://eand.co/how-britain-became-the-dumbest-society-in-the-world-e90431463924

Up........

Flowers for mother's day arrive on the same day that our new permament residency cards arrive. 

This week's favourite podcast Sophia Loren on Desert Island Discs was a joy.

Borders start to reopen for travel.

We share meals with friends from our bubble.

Kevin gets a new tractor.

The garden is bursting into life and I start seed sowing.... the cycle goes on

  

Goodbyes, too much rain and a happy hello.

Goodbyes

January gave us a sad goodbye, RIP Sam,  but for me, there was a welcome farewell. The change of President in the US brought the hope that dignity can return to politics.  

My worst memory of Trump among so many bad souvenirs was when he whipped up a crowd by mocking the physical disability of a journalist. The reasons for his appeal to supporters has been much discussed and it is futile to ignore the dissatisfaction that has enabled him and other populists closer to home. I read somewhere ' Populists are dividers, not uniters. They split society into “two homogenous and antagonistic groups: the pure people on the one end and the corrupt elite on the other,” and say they’re guided by the “will of the people.” I hope that with the change of President a new way can emerge that will lead to solving problems rather than adding to them.

Too much rain

This has been the wettest winter for almost thirty years apparently, It has certainly been the wettest we can remember. November is usually a wet month and we hope for its rain to fill up the lakes, waterways and water table ready for the hot days ahead. Then December usually brings bright, cold days just right for walks with the dog and short forays into the garden. This year it has been wet, wet, wet and then wet again. Our department, the Lot et Garonne, is one of the many in France that has been affected by floods or threat of floods as rivers rise. Many roads are closed and farmland underwater. We long for cold, dry days and can't wait for Spring to turn up and erase the wet memories once and for all. 

Some jobs can go ahead despite the rain. We have taken delivery of our annual half a pig and been busy butchering and transforming it. The freezer is heaving and we look forward to homemade sausages, home-cured bacon and many delicious pork-based meals. 

Kevin took delivery of 4 kgs of bitter oranges, a Christmas present that he had to wait for. He has transformed them into 38 jars of delicious marmalade and the smell of them cooking cheered a very gloomy couple of days. For me, it has been 'sew' far so good as for the first time ever I have met my target of using the winter days to get on with my sewing projects. 

Still, we are getting itchy fingers and want to be back in the garden getting everything tidied up and ready for Spring. Our fingers are crossed for goodbye to wet, wet, wet.

A happy hello

February starts with happy memories for us of our first hello when we met on the 3rd February 1996. It was a wet, wet February that year too. Invited to dinner a forty-minute drive away I was reluctant to leave a cosy house and an absorbing book. The invitation had included the rider 'you'll meet my brother ' and the matchmaking agenda wasn't appealing. How wrong I was and that rainy night was the start of an adventure that has amazingly brought us to our 25th year together.

A bientôt

Sam 2006 - 2021

' I hear you are looking for a dog' said our French neighbour. We already had a sweet, gentle fox terrier called Sally but were happy to welcome a companion for her.  Born on the 6th August 2006, this strange little character came to be part of our family.

Kevin brought him home and he was so small he fit in his hand. He had a slight underbite and the curliest hair! We called him Sam keeping with the letter S for all our pet names. We later had a grandchild called Samuel but Sam the dog came first.

We found out that he was the product of his mother and her own son so that explained a lot. When you stroked him his tail wagged but he made the most awful growling sound and it was hard to believe that was his happy noise. He didn't like having his bum on the floor and would sit on your feet or prop himself up on the hearth to avoid it.  He was always a scavenger, getting underfoot in the kitchen or hovering near the dining table. If he had been bigger I am sure he would have stolen food from the table.

Sally and Sam rubbed along, him tormenting and her tolerating. Gentle as she was she sometimes showed a fox terrier temper when he had gone one step too far and she rounded on him viciously meaning to put him in his place. He would run away but could never resist coming back to give her one last little playful dig. 

After Sally died he was totally bereft and so when we got a new puppy he seemed delighted but then you never could tell with Sam! They were like little and large but small as he was that boy could run. When we took them around the neighbouring orchards on their walks he was as fast as Schula the Labrador retriever when he got a scent. He never wandered far from home and would sit for hours on the back terrace guarding his property.

As he got older he became deaf and had very poor sight but he continued to seem content and to take part in the daily walks, and he could still give Schula a run for her money when he felt like it. He had become very thin but was still eating well and didn't show any signs of discomfort so we put it down to his age. Yesterday he came home from the walk and started screaming in obvious pain. A visit to the vet and a blood test showed something was very wrong and an x ray confirmed that cancer was widespread. Our funny little friend had reached the end of the road.

Time for us to say goodbye.

Meilleurs voeux

 Au revoir 2020. 

No apology for being pleased to see you go.

We were so much luckier than many. We stayed healthy, we had our garden and beautiful countryside all around us. We managed to see one of our children and three of our grandchildren for one short week. We were able to see our friends either via Zoom or in smaller groups. We didn't lose any revenue. We are settled in France. We had each other. 

Bienvenue 2021

Getting back to normal? 

Slowly, surely things will improve. 

I look forward to: 

seeing family again

getting vaccinated

having hugs,

the choir, the yoga the sewing group

working in the garden

travel

and all the normal, everyday things we have so taken for granted.

We wish you a more positive, more normal 2021, working together to make our world a safe happier place for everyone.